


CRAZY=GENIUS

by ThatFandomObsessedChick



Series: Lil Crazies [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes Gets a Hug, Bucky Barnes Has Issues, Bucky Barnes Loves Tony, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Doesn't Have A Metal Arm, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Kidnapped Tony Stark, M/M, One-Sided Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers is Not Captain America, Steve Rogers is a jerk, Tony Stark Does What He Wants, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark has had enough, Tony-centric, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, Young Tony Stark, tony is so done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-21
Updated: 2017-05-21
Packaged: 2018-11-03 06:47:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10961907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatFandomObsessedChick/pseuds/ThatFandomObsessedChick
Summary: Tony has been kidnapped so many times, some serious like Afghanistan and some utterly stupid like the time when he was kidnapped from his table in a restaurant and put in a storage cupboard in the same restaurant. This kidnapping thought, really gets the award for weirdest kidnapped and hottest kidnappers ever.





	CRAZY=GENIUS

Tony was used to being kidnapped, very used to being kidnapped. It's a yearly thing for him, sometimes is was serious like the Afghanistan kidnapping or it was simply stupid like the time a waiter managed to kidnap him because he didn't tip him as much as his coworker who wanted to go to performing arts college. His food had been spiked somewhere between the kitchen doors and his table and when he passed out, the waiter somehow managed to pull him into a storage cupboard without anyone seeing which was absolutely fucking ridiculous and tie him up with some dry rotten rope and demanded that he was paid one thousand dollars to be released. Tony rolled his eyes, put a little pressure on the rope, causing it to break and dragged the waiter out by his collar, explaining to a very angry manager what the hell had just happened. The waiter was fired instantly and Tony never went back to that restaurant, it was a shit hole anyway.

The weirdest kidnapping of all was the day the Avengers fought with The Super Bros, yes, they were actually called The Super Bros. No, they did not dress up as Mario and Luigi and prance around the city although that would have been cool. The Super Bros were genuinely mad. They attacked the city on a monthly basis, always pulling some crazy shit just for giggles like making soft toys come to life and attack their owners and hanging civilians upside down out of their windows by their bedsheets. There was also this one time they fucked with civilian minds and made them enter a messed up dream world and the Avengers had to enter the world themselves to save them. The one with the the brown hair was mutated to have strange powers over the mind and the other had unimaginable super strength. The worst part was that the two crazy men were in fact Captain America and his best friend, James Barnes. James and some other soldiers had been kidnapped by Hydra during World War II when Cap had assembled a team to go and rescue soldiers that included James from Hydra's evil grasp. Cap managed to get the other soldiers out but he and James got captured at the last minute. They were tortured and conditioned for decades before they were used as weapons for Hydra. They were a deadly force to be reckoned with, they were called Captain Hydra and The Winter Soldier. They took down countless people and organisations before they managed to regain partial memory and break away from Hydra's clutches. They were now known to destroy Hydra bases and mess with Shield because they were against secret government organisations. They also messed with the public for attention and humour in their dark, depressing lives because God knows, they had had a rough time from the start and only now it was starting to go up hill.

That's how Tony found himself flying through tens of thousands of screaming teddy bears that were making a cuddle pile on top of random, terrified but confused and pissed off civilians. Despite the situation, Tony almost choked on his own saliva when he witnessed a bald, fat, red faced civilian in a suit swearing and beating a pile of pastel coloured teddies into submission with his briefcase.

Tony few up high to get a better vantage point and spotted The Winter Soldier sitting on top of a truck, giggling and laughing like a maniac while his fingers danced in the air, creating little teddies out of his dark blue magic. As soon as the teddies materialised, they ran off to find a civilian or a distracted avenger to cling onto. Captain Hydra was dancing around his best friend, also laughing dementedly at the sight that was unfolding before them as he flung his shield jovially at attacking Avengers.

“Guys, I'm going in, I've got an opening,” Tony muttered through his comms to Sam, Natasha, Clint, and Wanda.

“Go for it Ironman, I'm getting tired of playing with these over grown babies.” Natasha replied, sounding downright unimpressed.

Tony swooped in while The Captain was trying to take out Clint and blasted Barnes square in the chest with a stun blast that sent the poor boy flying off the top of the truck, screaming as he went. When he lost his concentration, all the teddies that were materialising imploded into lollypops and the others who had already been formed exploded into little balls of cotton candy. Tony stared at the vision of candy surrounding him, distracted long enough for The Captain to turn and pounce at him, sending him crashing to the ground in an untidy heap.

“You hurt my best friend!” The Captain hollered as the started to rip apart Tony's suit with his bare hands, ignoring Tony's futile squirming and struggling.

“Hey, wait!” He heard Barnes yell just before he was lifted into the air as if he was flying but he had no control over his suit.

The suit exploded outwards, the pieces stopping and orbiting him a few feet away from his body. He looked around in shock and confusion as he felt his body rotated in a three sixty. His eyes landed on The Soldier who looked positively shocked at first then his face split into a wide, toothy excited grin.

“I want one, Stevie, can we keep it?” He questioned excitedly as he did a "come here" motion with his index finger to Tony and Tony found himself floating towards Barnes although he had no intentions to.

The Captain rolled his eyes and growled savagely, throwing his shield forcefully into the concrete, “You can't have it, Bucky! I want it!”

“Well you were going to kill it, you fucking brute! You just like to steal my ideas and you never come up with your own!” Barnes screamed and he stamped his foot harshly into the concrete, sending the other Avengers who were trying to attack and Cap flying.

Cap got up instantly, spitting and hissing as he ran back to Winter, grabbing a fist full of his long brown hair. Barnes screeched and lost concentration, loosing power over Tony sending him plumbing to the ground. Tony's feet hit the floor first but he instantly lost his balanced and he fell forward, hitting his head on the concrete. Just before he lost consciousness, he heard Barnes whining to Cap about him always being a controlling ass hole who never lets him get what he wants.

....

Tony woke up to the sound of squabbling. Two grown ass men throwing things and squabbling over him. Tony rolled his eyes behind closes eyelids and listened in to the conversation, trying to ignore his pounding headache.

“That's not fair, Steve! You know I saw him first and then you wanted him cos I said I wanted him cos you're a spiteful bastard who doesn't want me to be happy!” He heard Barnes whine from his left.

“That's not true! I let you choose what breakfast we should have cos you said honey nut Cheerios make you happy! That's very thoughtful cos I like waffles better and I ate the fucking Cheerios for you! That was selfless!”

Tony could practically hear the exasperated eye roll from Barnes as he replied, “That's not the same thing! Having something other than waffles for a day is not being selfless! You're still a selfish prick cos you only changed your breakfast this morning cos the waffles every goddamned day was giving you really bad gas!”

“It wasn't that bad and fuck you! I let you dress him!”

“In clothes that you chose!”

“No, you chose one of the three outfits I picked out for him!”

“Yeah but there was no point because the two I chose you said you didn't like so you technically chose what he is wearing! And then you told Meggy to dress him rather than me!”

“Cos I knew you woulda fucked him in his sleep!”

Tony cringed, curling up a little more.

“No I wouldn't have! What the hell do you take me for? A motherfucking rapist? I'm not a monster, Steve! I'd never touch him without consent! I'm not a monster!”

They both fell deadly silent for a moment, the tension so thick you could cut it with a knife.

“Well I let you carry him home!” Cap changed the subject to distract Barnes.

“You were going to carry him home anyway!” Barnes took the bait.

“You used your powers on me! You promised you would never!”

“You pulled my hair and you said you'd never hurt me!”

“That was after you broke your promise!”

“You were being aggressive! You made me scared!”

Tony slammed both fists down on either side of him and he sat up, face twisted with anger and annoyance.

“Can you please stop quarreling, you petty children!” Tony yelled, his eyes flying open for what felt like the first time in years. He threw a withering glare at each other the Super Bros and they shrank back, cowering like two children who had been caught with their hands stuck in the cookie jar. “Now will you try to be civilised and tell me why I'm here?”

Barnes shuffled a little and hunched his shoulders, obviously not up to speaking. He looked over to Cap who looked a fraction more confident and gave him a suggestive look.

“Um, we, um, want you to...I don't know,” Cap toed at the ground, “We have interest in you, princess. One,” He glared at Barnes shortly, “of us would like to court you.”

Tony stared at Cap in absolute shock then he looked around the room. It was strange and decorated in a silky pastel coloured Victorian style with strange outdated furniture. He realised that he was lying on a huge four posted bed that was surrounded with thick layered and ruffled silk curtains with little tassels dangling from the edges. The walls were duck egg blue with thin gold stripes running down the walls. He was laying on top of a thick, ridiculously comfortable duvet and he was wearing a dress.

Wait.

He was wearing a dress.

What the actual fuck?

He was wearing the most beautiful gold dress with a gold corset and white netting puffing it out. He looked down at his legs and saw that they were shaved and he was wearing white thigh high tights that had little red bows on the hems. His skirt was so short that it exposed half his now hairless thighs. Who the hell had taken the time to remove all the thick hair from his legs? Tony got a little curious and pulled his skirt to investigate whether or not he had fancy panties on and if they had shaved his nether regions. He forgot that the Super Bros were there and pulled his dress up far enough for them both to see. He was surprised when he found dark red lacy panties and a garter that connected to his thigh high tights. He tugged his panties down to find his private area 100% hairless and oiled for some weird reason. He looked up when he heard an awkward throat noise. He grinned a little when he saw that both his kidnappers were red in the face and Cap was covering his crotch area.

“Would you mind...um...not doing that?” Cap stuttered.

Tony raised an eyebrow, his thumb still hooked over his panties.

“What? You can't handle seeing my dick and you're the one who undressed me?” Tony asked.

“We didn't undress you, we have a person who did it for us.” Barnes muttered, his face still adorably red.

Tony rolled his eyes and put his skirt back down, “Course you did, so fucking noble of you.”

Tony sat up and folded his legs, being careful not to flash the boys and cause the psychos to pounce on him, “So, why do you call me princess and if you only want to court me, why the hell did you kidnap me? And also, what are you going to do to me?”

“Well...You are the son of Howard Stark, right? He was the king of engineering back in the day and you're gorgeous so me and Bucky made you a pet name. Princess.” Steve explained as if what he was saying madre the slightest bit of sense.

“I'm a guy, if you didn't notice.” Tony deadpanned.

“But you're beautiful and you're wearing a dress so you're a princess.” Barnes explained with a vigorous nod.

Tony pressed his lips together and rolled his eyes once again. These boys were so fucking stupid they were beyond help.

“So how long do I have to stay here? I do have a life you know and my friends will find your super secret hide out, save me then burn it to the ground and lock you up in Shield HQ with all the other psychotic criminals.” Tony huffed as he folded his arms over his chest and turned his nose up.

The two men spluttered and fumbled, trying to get their "princess" to stay

“We'll be good to you, we promise!”

“The best!”

“And we won't fight or make you mad or make you cry or hurt you!”

“We'll feed you and love you and hug you and make you smile and make you laugh!”

“We'll make love to you too!” Barnes added with a sly out of character grin and saucy wink witch definitely did not make Tony blush.

“Bucky!” Steve hissed angrily.

“Only if you want to.” Barnes added with a shy little nod, retreating back into himself.

Tony rolled his eyes once more.

“I don't care what you say, my friends will come and find me and do what we discussed but as long as I'm here, I'm getting out of this room. If you try and stop me, you'll be sorry.”

Tony swung his legs off the bed and realised how high it was. He had always been small but this bed succeeded in making him feel absolutely dwarfed. He hopped off the bed defiantly, huffing irritatedly when the Super Bros tried to help him down. He slapped at their hands, put on the stupid, dainty little red shoes they left for him and stomped out of the room. He rolled his eyes when he hear the distant squabbling of the Super Bros as he left the room, wondering if that was the only thing they did. If so, he didn't blame them for terrorising the public, even he would end up stirring crazy from living with his argumentative best friend for decades on end.

Tony made it to a mind blowing sweeping staircase, covered in rich, red carpet that matched the colour of Tony's panties. He softly padded down the stairs, eager to investigate but worried there might be something to hurt him around the corner. He made it to the kitchen when he heard a woman humming. It was a beautiful, soothing sound that seemed to drain away all the stress, anxiety and annoyance inside him. Tony peeked around the corner to see who was singing although he was adamant in not being seen due to the fact he didn't want the singing to stop. He laid eyes on a short, chubby woman, kneading dough to make what looked like some form of pie. She had long hair, plated up into a milkmaid braid with a few fly-away ringlets at the temples. She wore a white dress with a white frilly apron tied around her waist, absolutely cover in flour. Her cheeks held a flour dusted rosey hue to them, making her seem jolly and kind but Tony saw the truth. This woman was completely alone, he could tell be the look on her face. She had been isolated although she had the company of the Super Bros who obviously didn't care about her too much. Tony knew this because he'd seen the look in her eyes one too many times in his own. He looked like this throughout his whole childhood up until the team moved in with him and even then, he still hadn't felt complete. He decided that this woman needed some company so he silently walked into the kitchen, trying to think of a way to get her attention without frightening her. He stood in the middle of the dully lit kitchen and softly cleared his throat.

“Um, hello?” Tony called out softly.

The woman turned with a wide eyed stare.

“I am sorry if I was disturbing you and the masters, they have told me one too many times that my singing was too loud.” She muttered with her head low.

“Oh no! Not at all! Your singing is beautiful, Miss! I just came over wondering if you wanted company.” Tony replied, stepping forward once again.

The woman looked a little bit more disheartened.

“I'm sorry, dear child, but you are the masters new love interest, they'd never want you to be associated with the likes of me. I'm just the maid that makes sure they're fed and watered and that they don't burn down this house.” The maid said with slight smile.

Tony giggled and walked over to a bar stool and plonked himself down into it.

“I hope they thank you for all your hard work. This house is beautiful and I'd never be able to keep it in such tip top shape if it was just me.”

The woman's smile faltered.

“I can't say they ever have.”

Tony's brow creased.

“That's no good at all! How could they be so crule?”

“My dear, they forget their manners from time to time but they are never truly crule. They have been through so much I could never ask more of them that what they already give me.” The woman explained.

Tony nodded, twisting his hands in the fabric of his dress. He was about to open his mouth to ask her something else when The Captain barged in, obviously not having any respect for the doors. Tony glanced at the maid, shocked when he heard her mutter something filthy under her breath in Italian. Tony let a small smirk creep into his face, this woman reminded him so much of his late grandmother back in Italy, always caring and loving but had a fiery tongue that held no prisoners. That's where Tony got his charming personality from. Tony barely held back a laugh when he spotted a red faced Barnes scurrying after Cap, yelling at him for having "fuck all respect for their property! It cost an arm and a leg to keep this place, you should respect it!" Cap rolled his eyes and grabbed Tony by his bicep and tugged him so along, as if he was a toy.

“Ow! You're hurting me!” Tony cried as he tried to tug his arm out of Cap's bruising grasp while simultaneously stumbling along to prevent himself from dislocating a shoulder.

Winter growled in anger and let of a shot of electrical blue energy, nipping Cap's hand. Cap spat out a curse and lightened his grip on Tony who's heart was still beating ten to the dozen.

“What did I tell you about using your fucking powers on me?” Cap yelled, stalked over to Barnes, spitting in his face.

Barnes stood calm and collected, not letting Cap's anger faze him.

“I told you to control your temper. We both know what it does. You have no control when you're angry and you only stop once someone gets hurt or worse. Do you really want that to happen again?” Barnes asked with his hand resting on the left side of his stomach. “I hate using my powers on you but you have control issues and I don't want him to hate us because you broke his damn arm.”

Cap bit his lip and looked down at the floor.

“I apologize, I let my anger get a hold of me and caused you pain in the process. Will you forgive me?”

Tony frowned deeply.

“I'll forgive you once you return me to my home.

Tony smiled softly at the maid and left the kitchen leaving both Super Bros in the darkness.

....

Tony found himself back in the room the Super Bro's had prepared for him. He laid down on the bed, staring up that the sealing, wondering when he'd get to leave this crazy place. So far, the stay hadn't been too bad, just a bit weird and full of quick tempered muscular men who wanted to marry him or something. He was laying on a Victorian style bed that was much more comfortable than his own bed at home so that was one plus side. The downside was the corset he was wearing wasn't all comfortable and the pressure was causing his organs to hurt slightly. He attempted to remove the corset himself but he couldn't seem to reach far enough back to unlace his corset. After a good half an hour trying to get out of the fabric prison, he gave up and removed all what he could without taking off his corset or dress. He was sitting in the plain dress and corset, looking for objects to help him get the stupid corset when he heard a gentle knock at his door. He grunted in response, telling the person to come in, jumping slightly when he looked up to find the Winter Soldier at his bedside with a tray of lasagna and salad and garlic bread.

“I'm sorry I scared you, Meggy told me to bring you some food cos you're probably hungry.” Barnes muttered, twisting his foot in the carpet shyly.

“Yeah, thanks but I need you to help me get out of this fucking corset, I can't breathe.” Tony grumbled, kneeling up and showing his back to Barnes.

He heard Barnes literally gulp and place the tray down. He felt shakey hands unclip the corset and untie the laces. He felt the corset loosen and he let out the biggest sigh of relief. He felt Barnes' breath on his shoulder as he removed the corset and barely suppressed a shiver running down his spine. Barnes lingered for a little before moving away swiftly, going into the cupboard to get Tony a new, comfortable outfit to wear to bed. He returned with yet another feminine outfit but this one was a silky sky blue camisole with little silk boxers to match and thigh high silk socks with cute little black bows on top. The whole outfit was terribly cute, Tony had to admit and it wasn't as girly as the outfit he was currently wearing so he gladly removed the gold dress and held out his arms for the new outfit, not caring that he was buck naked. He rolled his eyes at Barnes' blush and made a little impatient noise, signalling that he wanted his clothing. Barnes shook his head and insisted that he take care of "his princess" and dress him. He reluctantly stood to let Barnes clothe him. First came he silk boxers then came the long thigh high socks that clipped onto the shorts by the little bows. Barnes then helped Tony into the sky blue silk camisole and gently smoothed out the wrinkles.

“You look, um, beautiful.” Barnes muttered softly as he hastily tucked his hands behind his back.

Tony let a small chuckle out at this guy's antics and sat back down on the comfortable bed.

“Whatever you say, Romio, just give me the goddamned food so I can sleep already.”

Tony was given the food and he didn't waste a minute trying to shovel the orgasmicly good food down his throat. He wasn't even concerned about his borderline sexual moans even though Barnes kept on awkwardly clearing his throat to get him to stop. Tony finished the food in a blink on an eye and went into the en'suite bathroom he saw across the room. He washed up with the brand new items provided and hurried back to bed as he was deathly tired. He wrapped up in the sheets, still ignoring Barnes who was standing awkwardly at his bedside.

“You can watch over me if you want, it's not like I need it though.” Tony muttered into the pillow.

Barnes grunted softly and the last thing Tony heard and felt before he fell into a dead sleep was the mattress dip behind him and a soft, innocent kiss being placed ever so carefully on his cheek.

“Goodnight, princess, I hope you're dreams are ever pleasant.”

.....

Tony awoke with a comfortable warmth pressed against his back and wrapped around his stomach. He felt soft little breaths being puffed out against his neck, tickling the little hairs growing there. Tony twisted gently in the sleeping Barnes' arms and felt a soft smile creep into his face. Barnes looked so calm and tranquil in his sleep. He looked as if he'd forgotten all his worries and hardships at the foot of the bed. He looked so much younger, so much more innocent that it took Tony's breath away. The poor thing must have only just ended his teen years when he was taken. He'd barely even lived his life and he had been through so much. Tony sighed and brushed a lock of hair from the older man's face then withdrew it in shock when he realised what he was doing. He'd read about Stockholm syndrome before but he really didn't believe it was real. Apparently it was, how else could he explain the growing soft spot he had for Barnes?

Tony was only young himself, eighteen in fact. He couldn't imagine being taken now and brainwashed until he forgot his own name and only responded to things some evil stranger ordered him to do. What if these two people never let him go? What if this was his life for the rest of his life? What if they actually we're still apart of hydra and took him to a secret Hydra base to get brainwashed and no one ever found him again and he'd be next seen a hundred years down the line with long brown hair and a fucing metal arm or something.

Tony was about to wake up the sleeping man when the Captain burst through the door and when he saw what was going on, boy was he angry. Tony flinched as Cap stormed over to the bed and hauled him out of the grasp of the more calm Super Bro. Cap grasped a horrified Bucky by the hair once again and tugged him onto the floor, causing him to scream in pain.

“What the fuck do you think you are doing? How could you do that? You,” Cap punched the wall beside Winter's head, “promised me you'd not touch him! You promised you'd let him have a choice between us,” Cap twisted his hand viciously in Winter's hair, “You promised me you wouldn't touch him!”

Cap snarled and grabbed Winter by the chin roughly.

“You fucking monster.”

All was silent for a few seconds before veins of blue started to pulse through the floor from Barnes' hands. Cap looked around in fear, realising what he had done. He tried to backtrack but was cut off by Winters deadly quiet and calm voice.

“I am not a monster.” Winter whispered.

The man's eyes began to turn black and wisps of blue tinted with black began to reach towards Cap and lift him into the air. Tony watched, horrified as Winter began to strangle his "best friend" in blind anger. Despite the fact that Tony had grown to hate Cap, he couldn't let Barnes accidentally kill him while blinded with anger.

“Hey, Barnes, you don't want to do this.”

Winter turned to him and Tony's heart jumped into his throat when he saw the black veins on his skin growing outward from his pitch black eyes.

“I think I do.”

Tony's heart stopped.

“I'm not a monster. He compared me to the, the things that did unthinkable things to me. He fucking understands what a monster is and he knows what they did to me. So he deserves what he gets if he would ever think I'd do anything like that to you." Winter turned away once again.

“He's your best friend, isn't he?”

Winter turned back to him.

Tony took in a deep breath.

“I've been blinded by anger before. All you see is red mist and you feel like you could do the worst thing possible to someone and then believe that they disserved it. Trust me, after you've done or said something to cause them immense pain, the mist and anger will clear and you'll feel awful. You'll want to take it back or somehow make it better but no matter how many times you apologize or try and make it up to them, it wouldn't get better. It's like driving nails into a post really, even if you pull the nail out, the damage has already been done. You can't fix what you break, James, don't do something you can't reverse. Don't destroy the one thing in your life that makes you happy, even though he's a massive dick.”

Winter stared long and hard at Cap then dropped him unceremoniously to the floor with a harsh thump. Barnes then stomped out of the room and slammed the door.

“You're a real fucking ass hole, you know that?” Tony spat then grabbed a silk dressing gown left out for him and swiftly left.

.....

Tony rounded the corner, his hands daintily brushing the silky wall paper of the house. He heard soft muttering from around the corner.

“I'm not a monster,”

Tony's heart broke a little as he witnessed James beating the shit out of an old, worn punching bag that looked like it had seen better days. He had tears in his eyes that he looked like he was desperately trying to hold back but obviously failing as one fell from his glassy eyes.

“Hey,” Tony called softly.

James jumped a foot in the air.

“Sorry for startling you, I wanted to just check if you were okay.”

“Well I'm obviously fine so you can go now.” James spat bitterly as he furiously tried to wipe away his tears.

Tony's heart broke even more when Barnes flinched in fear when he tried to walked towards him.

“You're crying, you're not okay.”

“Well why did you ask if it so obvious?” James shrilly asked while exploding the bag with his blue magic.

Tony flinched.

“I didn't ask you! I just came in here to check if you're okay!”

“Well are you can see, I'm crying but I'm fine so you can leave!” Barnes yelled with tears in his voice.

“We've just been over this, I'm not leaving!” Tony yelled back, throwing his arms up in exasperation.

“Alright, fine! I'm not fine! My best fucking friend just called me a monster and believe it or not, that hurt me more than anything I've ever been through and trust me, I've been through some shit that makes me wonder every day when I wake up how the hell I made it through that. He knows what they did to me, he knows and he still has the nerve to class me under the same name just because I was in the same bed as you! And what really hurts me is how he watched what they did to me and he legit has no compassion. I feel like he just enjoys breaking my heart on a daily basis even though he knows the hurts more than anything. I feel like I'm not worth shit to him.” Barnes finished, breathing hard with tears running down his face.

Tony let out a soft broken sound, his own eyes filling up with tears of sympathy. He softly walked over to Barnes who was trying in vain to hold back his sobs and enveloped him into a hug. Barnes broke and lost control, sobbing uncontrollably into Tony's shoulder. They sank to the floor, Tony's arms still around Barnes's neck and Barnes' around Tony's waist. They sat like that for a few hours, until Barnes cried himself to sleep with his face squished into Tony's neck.

....

Tony was sitting in the garden room on a rope swing when James stealthily ran in wearing him black Kevlar uniform and a black back pack. He ran up to Tony with a manic grin on his face, crashing to his knees and hastily opening the bag.

“Hey, I was thinking I would take you on a little adventure without Steve knowing!” He whispered happily as he pulled Tony's black undersuit from the bag.

Tony dropped the novel he was reading and gasped in surprise when he saw what was in James' hands .

“You have my clothes!” He cried.

“Shush! Keep the noise down or Steve will hear you and come in like an annoying dickhead and make you stay.”

“Okay, okay but you have to tell me where we're going first.” Tony demanded his his arms crossed over his chest.

“Can't, it's a secret!” James chirped as he kissed Tony's cheek.

Tony's eyes widened in surprise and he felt his cheeks burn red.

“You're so cute when you blush, turn around so I can get this dress off you you can wear your own clothes again.” James ordered.

Tony didn't know it was possible but he blushed even harder but turned around never the less. He felt James' hands pull the silky blue ribbon of his silky blue dress and pop open all the buttons running down his spine. James ran his hands over Tony's bare shoulders and gently pushed the now open dress down Tony's soft, naked arms. The touch was oddly sensual and Tony felt another blush rising as twinge of arousals ran through him. The dress fell gracefully to Tony's ankles and he stepped out of it, maintaining eye contact with James as he walked around in front of him. James then placed both hands on Tony's plush, perky buttocks and slowly and sensually pulled down, taking the fishnet stockings down with his hands. Tony felt a shiver run down his spine as James' hands caressed his muscular thighs and calves. Tony cleared his throat awkwardly and broke eye contact, his blush intensifying as he stepped out of the stockings and was left in the prettiest blue lace thong with little bows decorated with tiny diamonds. James stood back up and wrapped his arms around Tony's waist.

“Aren't you gorgeous?” He muttered with a soft kiss to the neck causing Tony to gasp quietly.

“We don't have any other clean underwear so you'll just have to wear that, It is really fucking gorgeous though.” James stated as he moved back and helped Tony into his flight suit.

“O-oh! Yep, that's fine, that cool!” Tony babbled, unsure of how to react properly.

Once Tony was all zipped up, James wrapped one hand around the Tony's waist and grinned like a maniac once again.

“Doll, if you're prone to nosebleeds, I'm sorry.”

Bucky snapped his fingers and suddenly a blue light enveloped them and Tony felt like he was going down a huge dip in a rollercoaster after spinning in circles for an hour while doing a triple back flip. They rematerialised over the Avengers tower when the nausea finally subsided and Tony could finally open his eyes, he squealed happily.

“Are you really letting me go?” Tony cried excitedly.

“Yep! I decided that if you like someone, you shouldn't kidnap them, rather find a way to court them and make them like you that way instead of locking them in a house with you for so long they start suffering from Stockholm syndrome.”

Tony's eyes widened.

“Ah, yes, that's a good idea.”

“Anyway, I'll just plonk you on a chair on the main floor where everyone is moping around the dinner table because you're gone.”

“Thank you for letting me go.” Tony whispered happily, rewarding James with a kiss to the lips.

James blushed cutely.

“Well, I shouldn't have taken you in the first place so I'll just return you.”

“Fair enough.”

“I will miss your beautiful face and stunning personality. Don't worry though, I will return, you know, bothering the general public is really fucking funny so I don't think we'll quit. I will come see you like a normal person though.” James moved his face closer to the eighteen year olds ear, “Hope I get to fuck you next time.”

“James!”

James pulled away and hastily kissed Tony's forehead, both cheeks, nose then full on necked him while gently twirling them in the air.

“Bye my pretty, I'll you you when I see you!” James tapped Tony on the nose and he was instantly engulfed in a sparkly blue puff of smoke and when it cleared a second later, Tony was sitting at the dining table with the rest of his stunned teammates. Tony realised he was still touching his lips from when James kissed him and quickly put it down.

“Um, hi?”

The room broke into a frenzy and he was instantly engulfed in a group hug and exclamations of "we missed you!" and "where on earth have you been?" and "are you okay?".

Tony laughed and told his teammates to sit back down and chill out because he had a long story to tell them. No matter how exciting it was being kidnapped by a sexy supervillain, he still loved his home more than anything.

The next attack a month later was priceless and Tony couldn't help but sit beside James on a bus, giggling like children at all the men of the city and the male avengers dressed up in sexy dresses like he was for the two weeks he went missing.

“Good God I love you!” Tony exclaimed while sitting on James' lap in a red jumper that had the word "Princess" stamped on it in gold, a pair of fishnets, red and gold killer heals and a pair of tight red shiny boy shorts with "Daddy's Boy" printed across the backside.

“I love you more baby doll.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed and if enough of you ask, I might even make a sequel!
> 
> Drop me a comment and kudos pretty please! It helps me survive.


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